House of Hope Online

June 30, 2024

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A couple weeks ago, on Father’s Day, we discussed the Father of lights and the following scripture from James 1:17: 

James 1:

 17 Every good thing bestowed and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation, or shifting shadow.

We said He withholds no good thing from us, and as part of that, He does not withhold discipline from us.

Proverbs 22:

 6 “Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Hebrews 12:

 7 It is for discipline that you endure; God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom [his] father does not discipline?

 8 But if you are without discipline, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons.

 9 Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them; shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of spirits, and live?

 10 For they disciplined us for a short time as seemed best to them, but He [disciplines us] for [our] good, that we may share His holiness.

 11 All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness.

Verse 10 teaches that the Lord disciplines us for our good, and verse 11 says discipline yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness.  We tend to think of discipline as unpleasant, even sorrowful, but the Greek word for “discipline” in verse 11 means tutoring, educating, or training.  The purpose of discipline is to teach.

And so, today I want to go a little further with the importance of discipline in our lives, and for those who are raising children, the importance of discipline in training our children in the way they should go.

Today’s world exhibits the harvest of a lack of discipline.  There are often no consequences to wrongdoing.  There are no deterrents or corrections of behavior.  We see an increased tolerance of sin in our society, and we are collectively suffering the ill effects of that tendency.

As you might expect, the Bible encourages us to discipline our children and to accept the discipline of our loving Father.  In fact, in Psalms 23 King David praises God’s discipline as a great comfort to him.

Psalms 23:

 1 ¶ (A Psalm of David.) The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not want.

 2 He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters.

 3 He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness For His name’s sake.

 4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil; for Thou art with me; Thy rod and Thy staff, they comfort me.  (NASB)

David was referring to the leadership of the Lord in his life, and he expresses in verse 4 that the rod and staff comfort him.  It is interesting that the Hebrew word for “rod” means correction.  The tendency of sheep is to stray from the safety of the shepherd’s guidance and the rod is therefore used to correct the error of its ways.  David is comforted by the fact that His loving Shepherd corrects him with the rod and guides him with the staff.  He knew he needed discipline.

This principle applies to us and especially to our children.

Proverbs 22:

 15 ¶ Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of discipline will remove it far from him.

Foolishness results from the lack of teaching, the lack of discipline.

Proverbs 29:

 15 ¶ The rod and reproof give wisdom, But a child who gets his own way brings shame to his mother.

Proverbs 29:

 17 ¶ Correct your son, and he will give you comfort; He will also delight your soul.

The rod and reproof give wisdom in correcting the child.  A child who is not so corrected lacks wisdom and therefore brings shame to the mother.  On the other hand, a corrected child will bring comfort and delight.

Proverbs 13:

 24 ¶ He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently.

The key word in discipline is to discipline diligently.  Proverbs 13:24 equates diligent discipline with love, and the lack of discipline with hatred.

Forms of Discipline

The word “rod” implies a physical discipline or spanking.  Nancy and I are parents of four adult children.  Back in the day, we believed in spanking as a form of discipline.  I was taught to make sure any anger had passed before I administered spanking.  It was important that I not spank the child to relieve my frustrations or anger over their disobedience.  The idea was to teach the child, not to express my emotions.

When I spanked our two older boys, Will and Anthony, I often would get the paddle out, and put them in position to be spanked, and then delay the actual punishment to give them time to think about it.  My thought was the anticipation of the spanking was more effective than the actual punishment.

Eventually, I began to hate the whole process.  Nancy and I got to a point where we could not bring ourselves to physically strike our children.  It is difficult to inflict pain on another person, especially one that you love so much.  So, our two younger children escaped spanking as a form of discipline. 

But we did not abandon discipline.  We found that removal of privileges was just as effective, if not more so, in correcting behavior.  We didn’t have cell phones back then, so usually we enforced a lack of television time, or put restrictions on some other activity the child enjoyed. 

The important thing is to make sure the child understands why they are being punished, and to remain consistent in administering the discipline.  Again, the idea is not to “get back at” the child in anger, but instead to teach them there are consequences to disobedience and the disregard of righteousness.  While the shepherd used the rod on the sheep, it was not to inflict pain but instead to correct behavior.

When the Lord disciplines us, He does not inflict pain.  Normally He withholds a blessing or leaves a prayer request unfulfilled.  We saw this principle last week in Isaiah 59.

Isaiah 59:

 1 ¶ Behold, the LORD’S hand is not so short That it cannot save; Neither is His ear so dull That it cannot hear.

 2 But your iniquities have made a separation between you and your God, And your sins have hidden [His] face from you, so that He does not hear.

Do not despise unanswered prayer.  We looked earlier at Hebrews 12:7, which asks: “What child is there that his father does not discipline?”  Hiding His face (presence) and not hearing our prayer can be forms of loving discipline from our Heavenly Father.  Whenever I feel a dryness in my spirit, I know I need to get with Him and ask forgiveness, whether it be for a misstep or an attitude of unforgiveness.  He, like any good parent, uses denial of privileges as a form of discipline, to teach us, to correct us, and eventually to guide us with His staff.

Importance of the Staff

I mentioned earlier that David was also comforted by the staff of his loving Shepherd.  The purpose of the staff is to provide direction.  The staff has a hook on the top to make it abundantly clear to the sheep where the future direction is. 

The importance of the staff continues even after children grow up.  As we age, we continue to need direction and our children continue to need direction.  The Lord provides the staff by speaking into our lives.  Look for His staff, teach your children to do the same, and you will be comforted amid any uncertainty, as David was.

Closing

The purpose of discipline is to lovingly teach by giving nurturing instruction.  Discipline yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness in us.  The rod is to correct past discretions and the staff is to continue to provide guidance and direction.  Both are so necessary today.

Be comforted in knowing we have a Savior who loves us enough to discipline us, to remove foolishness, and to produce in us a wisdom from above for guidance.  Praise Jesus.

Let us pray.

Father God, thank You for thy rod and thy staff, which comfort us.  Help to realize that You discipline us because You love us, and want to remove all foolishness from us.  Thank You for correction and direction, for wisdom and guidance.  Lord, please guide us in disciplining our children, that Your correction would work in their lives and Your direction would be made clear.  In Jesus’ name we pray.  Amen.